Late

LATE

Its been ages
since i last
posted an entry

Ive been busy
netsurfing
doing nothing
sleeping
relaxing
stretching about
contemplating
about my
"shit" of a life

How i could
have changed
some things

How i could
have done
things
differently

How i could
have achieved
something
more concrete
more...
whatever

I float

I want to be 16
again

I dont want to
care about
anybody
except myself

I want to live
in my
make-believe-everything-is-perfect
world

The world
that all youth
live in
where i used to be...
who i was...
the past...

And yet
I am here
holding on
to sanity

My brain
exploding with ideas

My mind
going blank

Myself
feeling nothing

Numb...

I must go on

Im a
pseudo grown-up now
Have too many responsibilities

And so
I thread
the long
winding
pathway
that is
my life.